Sometimes I Don’t Like My Husband and That’s Ok
I’ve been married seven years, and I've had some days of not even liking my husband but loving him unconditionally. Weird to say right? But it’s true!
Now and then we have days that we fight like small children over nothing that results in nights of laughter. There are days I want to throw a roll of toilet paper at him for not putting it on the roll but setting it on the counter. There are days I want to splash water in his face when he is soundly sleeping while I’m up at 5 am tending to a fussy baby.
If your getting married to live this fairy tale life of rainbows and sunshine you're batshit crazy! Marriage is work but worth it. There will be plenty of times you simply don't like your partner, but that doesn’t take away the love you share with them. There will be times he makes you laugh all day, and you’re reminded how much he is your best friend.
Speaking of best friends, there are days I have to call my best friend, and just vent of all the things he does that irks my soul, and that’s totally ok. We talked about this before, mom, you need to vent! Not every disagreement of course but now and then call up your good friend and vent away. It’s better to get it out vs. allowing your frustrations to build up and then blowing up on your man later. I actually hope he has someone he can vent to about me I’m sure he needs it.
Adding kids into the mix can make any relationship reach levels you never thought you would. Why do I have to be the one who always does the routine things and he gets to be the fun parent? Why do I have to be the one to keep a schedule of all the parent-teacher conferences and doctors appointments. Sometimes I want him to do those things, and I follow along, but that’s not how it goes.
In any partnership, there will be things you are great at and things your partner is great at doing. In my case I love to plan and organize, so guess what? I’m the one scheduling our life, and that’s ok. On the other hand, my husband is much better at handling homework with our oldest and working with development skills with our youngest. Learning from the beginning what you are great at and enjoy doing will help to decrease the additional stress in your relationship.
I don’t like how my husband sometimes just doesn’t get it. Stop asking me “do you have an attitude” instead simply do a nice gesture to change my mood if you feel my mood is off. Run out and grab my favorite wine when you see I’m overwhelmed from the day and ready for it to end. It’s the simple things I look forward too.
What I’ve learned over the years is that I suck at communicating my wants. I spend so much time expressing what I need that I often time skip right over my wants or desires and my husband isn’t a mind reader. Now, this doesn’t give him a pass of course, but communicating effectively can save you from a ton of small disagreements.
MEN IRK! I Probably say this at least five times a day, literally. The way they breathe, think, and do IRKS!
I feel as though someone is reading this and thinking “why is she still married then” or “why is she bashing her husband or men.” First off this is NO WAY meant to bash men or my husband I love him why would I do that? And I’m married because I am happily married to the best man for me! I’m just here to say what many of us think but choose not to say.
After seven years I get asked often what’s the trick to making it last. My answer is always the same.
“Communicate, give up the bullshit fairy tale, laugh often, have sex, and know that sometimes you simply just won’t like your husband... and that’s OK!”